I have spent over eleven years living in my house. I know that because we moved in exactly two weeks before my son was born. He will be eleven on Monday.
Time flies.
I'm getting a divorce. My husband is moving in here with his girlfriend. I really don't care.
I liked my house for the time that I lived in here. I love my neighbor across the street. I love how close we were to the major highway that takes me other places. For a while I loved my new pool. I'm so ready to go now though. It's done. It's over. It's time to leave. I am so fine with it that it's almost weird.
The good thing is that because I am fine with it my children are fine with it too. I found a way to make them excited about divorce. That's not easy, friends. It takes a little work, a lotta smiles, and the fact that you are going to live right across the way from four professional soccer players to get them all revved up.
So much has happened in the past year. Good things. Sad things. Bad things. It's all just life though, right? One big circle. Life and death. In between you gotta be happy. You have to figure out a way to make everything okay, even when it's not. You sure do if you're an adult and you have children. Children need you to smile. They need you to watch out for them. They need to watch you and make sure you're okay so they can be okay too. You need to do your very best job to not fuck them up even when everything else has seemingly gone crazy. I think that is a mother's job and I take it very seriously.
My daughter asked me if I will miss our house. I could look her in the eye and say with complete honesty, "No." I will miss one thing about our house though. This is the truth. I will miss lying in my bed in the Spring time, looking out the window and seeing the pink Dogwood tree bloom. It's a beautiful tree. It makes me happy when I know it's going to start blooming. Chase and Saige love it too. We talk about that tree when it's at it's best. It's so pink and fluffy that the petals look like cotton balls. It has grown so tall over the years that it blocks the whole second story window. It fills it with Spring. I'm glad this is the last thing I will remember missing when I move. It will remind me that trees bloom every year. It doesn't matter what happens to you in between. Just like the tides come in. The earth revolves and children grow older. (I'm getting older too) Life goes on.
I'm so excited.
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I think that's actually a cherry tree, but what do I know. I totally know what you mean. When I woke up in your bed this morning I really enjoyed looking out at that tree, too. So pretty. ;)
ReplyDeleteWell, I wish I could wake up in your bed one morning... any morning... no really. Beautiful post Amy. Life does go on and it is going to be amazing. Love you.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in bed with you two that morning, I loved it too!! You are both so pretty in the morning!
ReplyDeleteThis was a sweet post and I had a great comment but I totally forgot what it was after getting distracted by all these women having been in bed with you.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'll miss is all of the creativity and color you filled that house with, both literal and otherwise. It was a constantly changing museum, and experiencing it was almost sensory overload. Actually, maybe I won't miss it so much as remember it fondly and be grateful I was able to experience it. As you wrote, life moves on and presents us with new and wonderful and sometimes challenging things to experience. I'm looking forward to visiting your new home, and seeing how it reflects who you are now and who you will become. Glad I'll be there on Day 1. Love you, sis.
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